तेरी ओर

हर जगह अब तुम दिखती हो,

जैसे खेतों में लहराती सरसों की चादर...या चाँद की ओडनी ओढ़े यह रात.
जैसे मदहोश कर देने वाली रात की रानी, या पलचीन में छुपी एक अधूरी कहानी.

जैसे कभी घर के आँगन में सूरज धीरे से कदम रखता है,
या जैसे कभी बर्फ से ढकी  धरती पर एक फूल उगता है.

कभी गाओं की गलियों में खिलखिलते बच्चों की हसी में छुप जाती हो,
तो कभी मेरे तकिये तले एक ख्वाब सजाती हो

जैसे पहाड़ों में चलती ठंडी हवा मुझे अपने आप से बाँध देती है,
वैसे ही तुम्हारा एक ख़याल मुझे ऐसे जाकड़ लेता है जैसे नदी सागर  को

जैसे ऊँचे ऊँचे पहाड़ों से झरना ज़ोर से धरती की तरफ़ गिरता है...वैसे ही मैं ना जाने क्यूँ तुम्हारी ओर खिछा चला जाता हूँ.

मेरे हर्फ की कहानी

मेरे हर हर्फ में छिपी कहानी हो तुम

कभी मोहब्बत भरे हरफ़ में छिपा "मोह" हो तुम

तो कभी चाहत के हर्फ में छिपी "हद"

कभी दर्द में छिप कर "दुआ" बन जाती हो

और कभी दुआ में छिप कर "आह"

हर्फ - means "word"

INSPIRED (2)

छू लिया है तुमने मेरे ख्वाबों को यूँ

कि अब तो अंधेरे भी मेरी मुस्कुराहट पहचाने लगे हैं

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बस गये हो मेरे ख़यालों में यूँ

कि रोएँ भी तो आँखें ग़ज़ल गाती हैं

SILENCE...

They said, there is peace in silence
They never said whose silence.

My silence screams at me...her silence shouts at me, hits me, kills me!!

My silence questions me...her silence mocks me, goads me, loathes me!!

My silence is deafening...her silence...STABBING!!

CONVERSATIONS (2)

She : Are you taken?

Me : My Body is,

        My Thoughts maybe,

        My Words aren't

INSPIRED...

There in solitude lay your words

Talking to each other, like a link in a chain

Yet so different, each with a story of its own

I heard each story, and then heard the story of each word in the story

The word "I" spoke of you, the "you" spoke about a Magic Land.

The "we" spoke about me, and "me" well it just smiled as it spoke to you.

Everything again seemed to make a Li'l more sense,
everything again somehow seemed a little brighter today.

Everything seemed like the gold at the end of a rainbow,
I again saw beauty in the castle made of sand.

Everything again seemed to help me unwind,
to be found and then lose again in your Magic Land.

WHO AM I?

Life as it seems, like a blank canvas at times...
With every new person filling in their colors...

But who am I...just an extension of You, and You, and You!!! 

I MISS MYSELF

Do you ever get that feeling that there is someone else living inside your head?
Someone so different from how you imagined yourself to be, that honestly you probably feel that you don't know yourself at all.

I live with that feeling almost everyday nowadays. If I ever to meet myself as a stranger, I would probably fail to recognize myself.

My sense of achievement seems to have been taken away...
My arrogance...ha!! whom am I kidding...the narcissist was tortured to death
My self belief...it just seems to vanish away with every word I share
I lose people and friends faster than I make new ones.
I can't talk anymore, can't hold a conversation for more than 5 mins.
I don't just bore people...I bore myself.

I stare at blank walls, and the tears don't stop rolling...and I don't even know why
I look back 5 years...and I miss myself.

My doc says I am suffering from borderline depression...I am not surprised. 

CONVERSATIONS (1)

She: Why do you like talking to me?

He:   Sometimes no reason, is the best reason

She:  That's not possible, everything has a reason

He:   The Reason is you

         There is just so much in so little of you, that even a little of
         you is pretty much all I want :)

IT'S YOU, IT'S ME

It's your form the rain washes over...

It's me who is left wet with desire!!

It's you whom the sun decides to shine on...

It's me who glows in your radiance!!

It's you whom the flowers decide to bloom for...

It's me who bathes in your fragrance!!

It's you whom the mist decides to hide...

It's me who gets lost in your illusion!!

It's you whom the rainbow decides to come out for

It's me who gets painted in it's colors!!

NA JAANE KYUN...

Na Jaane Kyun

Hota hai yeh Zindagi ke saath

Achanak yeh Mann

Kissi ke Jaane ke Baad, kare fir uski Yaad,

Choti Choti si Baat

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Every fucking time!!!

A STRANGER IN MY DREAM

I saw a Stranger in my Dream...or was I in a Strangers Dream

Unspoken, Hidden Glances, Stolen Moments...Kiss under the Cherry Tree

I hate those Dreams...you know the ones which silently talk to you in your sleep. Those Dreams which make you wonder about the "what if"

I love those Dreams...you know the ones which silently comfort you in your sleep. Those Dreams which make you wonder about the "what if"

Rehashing this post from my other Blog manily 'coz of Soumya's comment on the previous post

DO YOU KNOW WHAT I AM TALKING ABOUT?

Kehne ko saath apne ek Duniya chalti hai

Par chupke is Dil mein Tanhaayi palti hai

I had these lines in drafts for 3 days now...yet not been able to further build on them. Maybe 'coz these 2 lines capture everything I want to say. I don't know...do you??

PEOPLE ADDICTION

Addictions are bad…no matter what it is…but you are good…better than good…so who is wrong?? The thought or me??

Can people turn into addictions…Am not saying habit…I am talking about addictions here…the ones you become obsessed about…ok again not being obsessed with that person…but being obsessed by their presence.

One might very well have someone else in his/her life but that one person still needs to be there…even that person can have someone else…married or just seeing someone…but there is still a constant need for you to talk to them…or just hear a hi from them once a day…how exactly do we define this?? You don’t feel jealous of anyone in their life…just that you feel sad when they are not there in yours…even hurt at times

ADAPT TO SURVIVE

You know that concept...Adapt to Survive and all that jazz. I think it was not only for life, it was for living as well.

Okay let me explain...does doing the same things over and over make us happy? No right...so we adapt our happiness. We change the things which make us happy...

...We adapt so our happiness survives

We do it unknowingly...we change our food habits, we change our movie choices, we change the kind of music we listen to...we even change the person we Love!!

Don't judge me by that last sentence...well okay judge me if you want to, but it's true.

How else do you explain falling out of love?
Or doing things which you might not like so much but your significant other does?
Making him or her happy is also linked to our happiness right?
So we are adapting so our Happiness survives ironically by doing things we don't like...

...I don't even know why am I writing this...maybe I just wanna hear what others have to say about this. So go on...comment...I would love to read your thoughts on this

THE STAR TWINKLES AGAIN...

The Star twinkles again...those who have known him, know the face.
Those who don't....you are not missing anything.

It's been 4 years since I last penned down my thoughts....4 years since I felt the need...4 years since I could get myself to do it. A little older...not so much wiser. I kept going back looking for my innocence...I kept getting lost and losing more than just innocence.

I hope I can continue...but I also hope some secrets don't spill....shhhhh ;-)